It has been a long week already taking the girls to the orthodontist, getting medical records, and trying to figure out what to do next with Lauren`s neurological issues, but then late yesterday afternoon I got a call that just made everything else I had been doing all week seem like the run of the mill stuff.
The call was not from the usual, I don`t get FASD, attachment disorders, vulnerable kids, and multiple disabilities, it was from someone else who has a lot more clout then that. "Do you REALLY need the services that you have and those you are waiting for"?
Well now what do you say to that? I just don`t know sometimes what to do next. First of all, all four of our adopted kids meet EVERY criteria they have, in fact they all have multiple disabilities that qualify them many times over for the same services. I was asked to give up services for them so that other people could get help and then they could get them later. NO WAY am I going to do that. We already have a kid who is severely disabled who is on a waiting list for services and I guess after this conversation that is not going to change any time soon. When we adopted these kids we were told that there would be services out there to meet there needs. That has not been the situation at all, in fact they are losing services all the time. We are paying for medical care that is no longer covered by their insurance, maintenance therapy that is no longer covered, and we have legal bills because of their disabilities. and even if you used all of our income that might cover the cost of meeting the needs of one of the four kids. Then what would we do to feed, clothes, and shelter all of us? We will have bills for the rest of our lives because we adopted them. I used to trust that when someone told me that things were going to happen they would, but I have been an adoptive mom of kids who have special needs, to long now to do that any more. I have been blown off by a system that does not work, one to many times to go there again.
Believe it or not we REALLY do need the services. We have two kids who will become adults in a year and then we will have a whole new world of crazy system to deal with. For now all I can do is celebrate one last year of them being kids and then I will REALLY have to get to work because they will still REALLY need services. There disabilities are not going to magically disappear.