Tuesday, July 24, 2012

The Run Around

I am definitely getting the run around and it is beginning to make me just a bit angry. I have 3 kids who have complex medical issues for which they need treatment in the metro area. We are supposed to be reimburssed for our travel expenses, but in order to get that payment we need an annual referral.  We have had the same physician write the referrals for the past 12 plus years and they have been fine. Now the referral which clearly states that the kids have complex medical issues and need to be treated out of this area is no longer good enough. They want:
     ALL the medical diagnosis
     names of ALL the physicians and therapists
      a specific number of appointments
      exact dates and times of ALL appointments
      specific locations of all appointments when the referral is written
     assurance that there is no provider closer who can provide the care

Our physician does not have time to be writing ALL of this out just for a travel reimbursement and I don`t have time to be bugging him about this all the time.  Besides those 2 factors we do not have any idea how long (likely for all of their lives) they will need to be followed, the physicians and therapists change frequently, and we certainly do not know the dates and times of All appointments in advance. If we have a seizure issue tonight we may be running immediately. 
I spoke with a supervisor who told me that if we could afford to adopt these kids then we could afford to cover these expenses and we should stop bother them about this .

My response is that even though they are going to try to make this impossible I WILL be there with whatever paperwork they want, heck if it makes them happy they can pay one of their staff to follow me around while I take these kids to all of these appointments. The issue here is simply that they are eligible for this service (and many others which no one even bothers to tell you about) and all of this running gets expensive. The payments do not in any way cover our costs.  The whole idea that middle class families can absorb the expenses incurred raising kids with special needs is beyond nuts.  This is what we get for adoption support around here and it needs to stop.  We are families who sacrifice much while caring for the kids society throws away.  

Sunday, July 22, 2012


I took Hanna into see the foot doc. We were supposed to be deciding the marits of an orthotic/brace verses leaving it alone.  It turns out that she has broken the screw that was holding the bone in her heel together off sometime in the last eight weeks. The thing is free floating in there and she HAS to be in pain, but given the choice between telling someone (which means getting it fixed) and suffering she will always choose to suffer. The Doc says that about 15% of the time those screws cause pain and need to be removed, but he has never seen someone break it off like that.  Hanna can accomplish just about anything if she wants too.

This tells me that her mental health issues far out weight the physical ones.
That is rather scary when you stop to think about the affects that has on her well being. She will without giving it a second thought harm herself or others. 

We need to get that screw out of there as soon as possible so she is scheduled for surgery July 30th. I guess there will be no more swimming and running around outside for her for the last month of summer vacation.  Just thinking about it is making me tired already.

As her Dad says the kid has a few screws loose all the time.

Friday, July 20, 2012

Van Shopping

Well, the accident drama continues.  We are getting a new vehicle, I don`t know what kind just yet, because figuring that out is not one of the things I do.  My husband is much more interested in shopping for those things and knows a lot more about engines, mileage, etc so we will leave the decision up to him and his little buddy, Paul.  Paul is so excited about looking at the dealerships and going for rides in different vehicles, his brain is in total joy with all this action.

We are still trying to work out the ramp/lift issue.  Insurance is not going to pay even one-tenth of the cost of replacing the lift we had.  Waiver services is not going to pay anything at all (since our van was to new).  That leaves us with taking care of it ourselves.  We are going to have to come up with something that is cheap, really cheap.  The only problem is that while being cheap it has to work.  We have to be able to transport Lauren`s power wheelchair.  For right now the only way we can do it is if we pull our trailer behind our truck or big van and that sure creates some parking hassles.  We have found one solution that would work, but it would require that her wheelchair have a seat that folds forward, and of course that would cost $$$ as well.

We had the bills down to the basics of electric, gas, and mortgage, I guess that will be changing soon.  With all the appointments and running with kids I do I need a van so I will take the bills too.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

A Total Mess

Tuesday evening we were sort of wrapping things up, okay we are in Minnesota so another half hour or so of chatting at our adoption support group, when Karre comes to tell me "Dad needs you right now". The first thing that comes to mind is what the heck is Hanna up to now? As we quickly exit the meeting I call to see what is going on.

It turns out, for once, it has nothing to do with Hanna. Trevor was driving the mommy car, as Paul calls it, better known as the grocery getter home from North Dakota when he was in an accident. He is bruised and scraped up, but will be okay, thank goodness! Our handicapped accessible van on the other hand is likely totaled. The front axle is seriously bent, the wheel is off, the glove box is in the back of the van, the windows are all busted, and the lift is no longer where it belongs. It was taken away from the scene in several pieces since it can not be driven.  Those are the damages I can clearly see and understand, and then there are damages to the chassis, something about a steering column, and other stuff that I do not understand.

So now we have insurance to deal with. They are getting things done in a timely fashion, another thank goodness. We also have to figure out who with pay to replace the lift, insurance, county, or us. Normally lifts can not be replaced for seven years and more then a hundred thousand miles. We had not yet met either of those requirements.  We have to find a van and decide if we will put a lift in it or not. We are looking at more portable options, but not sure yet what will work.

We have had no vehicle payments for two and a half years and had planned to keep it that way for several more.  All we are getting out of this mess are bills and considering the could have beens, that is okay.

Monday, July 9, 2012

One Of Those Days

We have been smoothly sailing through summer, oh we have the usual Hanna garbage going on, but it has been okay, until yesterday.  I just could not take her crap for one more minute.  She had smacked Paul, HARD (there was a lovely hand print on his face). He had told her multiple times, even yelled at her to "get out of my bubble" but she just kept irritating him until he finally lost it and through a book at her, (which, by the way missed) and then she smacked him more then once. Then she just had to tell her Dad that she did not do nothing, (of course not, she never does anything wrong). Lauren and I both saw everything and Paul`s face had the evidence, too so why on earth do you have to lie about the obvious?

Using as few words as possible Dad and I explained that young ladies (who will be 15 in a few days) do not hit people and then lie about the obvious. Things will work out rather poorly for them if they continue to do that.

We all got some sandwiches and juice together and went to the park leaving her home with a PCA. Thank you very much for releaving us!!  It would have been a rather unpleasant Sunday afternoon otherwise. Oh how I wish this nonsense would stop forever, but I know that is not going to happen so we prepare for the worst and hope for better.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

My Wise Acre

You would think Paul was a real wise acre, like his Dad and older brothers Jared and Trevor are. They have a sarcastic remark for almost everything.  In reality he is totally serious when he says these things.

Yesterday we were talking about numbers. He has trouble remembering to go left to right so when putting cards down to make the number twenty-three he will put the three first and then the two. I asked him "how would you write the number nineteen" and he says "get a pencil and paper".

This morning he was going totally nuts, hollering something about there being to many holes in his underwear.  I had gotten rid of all the to small. destroyed stuff and replaced them with new ones so I had no idea what this was about. When I went to check the situation out, I found that he had discovered that boys underwear have a fly in them. Now he wants to know "why boys need holes in their underwear". I guess we will be teaching him how to use the fly when toileting. I have never actually had to teach a boy that before, they just figured it out for themselves.