One Messed Up Kid

We have been having a conversation with Hanna over the last several days that is getting no where.  There is a field trip in a couple of days which involves shopping, buying lunch, and bowling.  Hanna does not want to go on this trip at all, in fact she asked if she could stay home with me, which she never wants to do.  I am not going to be home since I have to be at the hospital with Lauren for a procedure which will take several hours.

Hanna has no money since she made all of her allowance  ($180.00) disappear to who knows where. She was supposed to be saving it to replace some of the things she has destroyed around here.  Anyway she has no money so she would have to "just look" when shopping, she would have to bring a bag lunch, and her own bowling ball and shoes.  We told her that she could earn the couple of dollars it would cost to bowl by doing chores here. She has made it very clear that she is not going to pay to participate, she would really like us to give her money to shop, have  lunch, and bowl, but that is not going to happen here.  She gets allowance which would be available for her to use if she would quit destroying everything and trying to mess with us.  She has siblings who are watching so we will not be changing the rules for her.

Given the fact that Hanna does not like bowling (or anything else that she might lose at) or as she will tell you, she HATES bowling she has absolutely no intention in doing anything to earn the money needed to participate. There is no amount of explaining that sometimes you need to do things even if you do not want to do them or that this could be fun  if she wanted it to be.

She is just going to have to go on the trip and do nothing.  It is interesting that the teacher was able to come up with something that is more evil then the stuff Mom and Dad  make her do.  She really thinks she is bothering all the adults in her life, but all she is doing is making herself miserable.  The rest of us will move along just fine no matter if she makes good choices or not.

No More Pancakes

We have pancakes for dinner occasionally and there are always leftovers.  I make all the batter into pancakes and put them in the refrigerator so the kids can warm them up in the microwave for breakfast. That works well until Dad happens to be supervising one morning.

Hanna knows that they are allowed 2 pancakes, that is it, no more, no less.  Apparently the last time they had pancakes Hanna was the last one to get hers and there happen to be 3 left, so Dad, being the nice guy, allowed her to have all 3 of them.

This morning there were pancakes for breakfast and of course Hanna, the kid who can`t keep track of a thing or remember how to do anything without lots of cues and reminders just happened to remember that Dad let her have 3 pancakes last time so that is what she wanted.  I was supervising so of course I am the mean mom who never lets her do anything.  There is no explaining or reasoning with her on this one. She had 3, that is a fact so now she wants 3 every time, and she will do whatever it takes to get what she wants.

Dad and I will have to have another discussion about NOT changing things no matter if it is logical or not.  DO NOT do anything just to be nice to this kid because it will eventually end in a screaming, flapping, hitting, mess sooner or later. Needless to say we will not be having pancakes any time soon.

Clean Bathrooms Or Drama?

I decided that I needed to clean bathrooms today, even though that was no where on the schedule this morning since I needed to deal with the furnace man coming and get the usual Monday morning laundry under control. The bathrooms, of course always need cleaning, but I got it done because I needed to work off some frustration, not because it was bathroom cleaning day.  Now how could a mom like me, who does well with order, routine, schedules, kids who all went to school, more medical appointments in a year then most people go to in a lifetime, paperwork, and doesn`t mind cooking, laundry or dishes get frustrated?

There is only one thing that nuts me up enough to clean bathrooms before Wednesday morning and that would be...Hanna.  She has been ssssoooooo in crazy land lately.  I don`t know what is up, but it needs to stop soon.  She has been harming herself, stealing, lying about everything, and just plain out of sorts pretty much since school started 6 weeks ago.  I don`t think school is the issue here since she has the same teacher, is in the same classroom, has almost all of the same daily routine, rides the same bus, etc, but she isn`t talking so I really don`t know what has gotten her so rattled.

I did get her an appointment to work on medication changes that may be needed, but that is a month from now, unless someone else decides not to keep their appointment before then. I told them that if they had anything else open to please let me know, heck I will even rearrange Lauren`s appointments if necessary. (That is a real hassle so it seldom happens) but I will do it if I have too. 

So until we have less drama around here the bathrooms at our house will be clean, hum, which do I prefer, clean bathrooms or less drama?  I would let the bathrooms be a disaster in exchange for less drama, any day.

Routine, Some Day

We are starting the week out trying to get back to routine.  Last week was home coming and all that goes along with that.  By the end of the school week Hanna was beginning to come unglued.  She continued to spiral downward all weekend and today she is home because her behavior would certainly get her sent home. We might as well omit the drama of that. Hopefully she can get her act together in a day or two.

Lauren is having less pain and head aches so she is going to try to go to her job on the regular schedule this week.  I hope it goes well for her.  She is obviously feeling better because when her big brother teases her (yeah Trevor it is you) she actually responds appropriately.  She is much more alert and has asked to help with things like making dinner, putting away clothes, and organizing the playroom.  She has a long way to go to get to where she was before this all started, but at least things seem to be moving in the right direction. 

Well after we get back to routine this week we have two and a half days off from school next week, so the heck with routine again.  Oh well, that is just the way it goes around here.

A Royal Day

Today the king and Keen (queen) of Sweden came to celebrate the 150th anniversary of the college that was started here by Swedish immigrants.  All of the kids who attend Paul`s school got to walk over to greet them.  He was a very excited little boy this morning.  Watch out when he is waving that blue and yellow flag!

This afternoon at the high school they were having the annual powder puff games for homecoming.  The seniors dressed up.  Allen was a beautiful Pink Princess.  He cheered his team on in the volleyball game.

Lauren Update

Several people have called and emailed to see how Lauren is doing.  I have been at a retreat this weekend so PCAs have been taking care of her.  She is still having headaches most of the day and still needs to lay flat and be medicated regularly. 

She has been looking forward to going back to school tomorrow since the day she had surgery.  We are going to try for half days at least for now.  That means that she will not be going to her job, but we have to get her more stable before we work on that.

This is a slow process which requires everyone to be flexible. We don`t know what will work so we will have to take things one at a time for now. For now we just need to get rid of the pain she is having and then we can move on to something else.  Hang in there Lauren!

We Are Home

 We made it through that great vacation.

 This is about 12 hours after surgery.  Lauren`s face was rather swollen.  She was not talking or moving much at all.  She just hung out with her purple teddy bear (Violet) buried somewhere in the blankets,

 This is the next morning when she got in her chair to work on her goal of going home.  She had to be able to sit in her chair for at least an hour and a half, but this look on her face after only about 3 minutes made it clear that she was not going to be going anywhere.  She made it 10 minutes and was put back in bed.  After tears, medications, and a shunt adjustment she rested well for the remainder of the day.  She got her nails painted, played with the therapy dog, and the music therapy group came to her room.

The next morning she was able to be in her chair long enough so we got to go home.  She is a pretty happy girl laying on the couch with the cat.

Now we deal with some pain issues while she adjusts to having the pressure in her head at a normal level.  This process could take several months.  We also wait to see if there will be improvements in her neurological function.

Anyway we made it.  I am going to a retreat this weekend.  Lauren`s care will be in the hands of wonderful people who I am sure can handle this shunt thing just fine.  Dad gets to hold the fort down here with 3 PCAs to help him out.  I will be back to deal with all of this first thing Monday morning.